argus hamilton daily column

"I'm an English Monarchist and a Southern secessionist," Argus says. Any debate between Trump and Biden should be held in the balcony of the Muppet Theater. The Irish Catholic president saw Protestant Belfast, toured castles in Ireland that were owned by English lords and he met with Englands prime minister who is Pakistani. You can read Argus Hamilton's outrageously funny humor column on the Internet Tuesday through Friday and Sunday -- at www.argushamilton.com/today.htm. However consider the argument for sloth. Its so sad.If PGA golfers would just tee it up in the rough every now and then when nobodys looking, they might get it out of their system.Californias Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals upheld the state ban on affirmative action in college admissions Monday. It is available for print and websites through ExtremeInk.com. Its the most liberal court in America. Copyright 2023 All American Speakers Bureau. Grow a pair. There are currently 157 luxury homes for sale in Cagnes-sur-Mer, Provence-Alpes-Cte d'Azur on JamesEdition. Argus was honored by Oklahoma Governor Brad Henry as the official comedian of the Oklahoma Centennial and appeared with the governor in the 2007 Tournament of Roses Parade. Comedian and nationally syndicated columnist Argus Hamilton entertains at corporate events and meetings around the country. It also identifies the celebrants who need to go to rehab. Who is Argus Hamilton, and why is everybody quoting him? Get ready for all of The Comedy Store tales! |, Hamilton: Honoring Willie, the man whos smoked everything. Argus Hamilton performs at corporate, political and charity events around the country. Argus Hamilton admits he's not the type of guy to do something that's no fun. Find Property for sale in Cagnes-sur-Mer, Provence-Alpes-Cte d'Azur. Argus James Hamilton III is the son, grandson and great-grandson of Methodist ministers in the South. NBC's broadcast of the Summer Olympics in Japan began to draw bigger TV ratings this week as the public became familiar with some of the athletes. Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. Hens are now identifying as roosters, Hamilton: Classified documents discovered at Mount Vernon, Hamilton: Our leaders taking their (classified) work home with them. These cookies do not store any personal information. bio for Argus Hamilton agency, manager, speaker fees, speaking agency entertainment booking agency, speaker's fee, how to book, booking agencies for lectures, speaking event, celebrity appearances for hire, who is agent, manager, publicist, who represents, speakers bureau management who represents Argus Hamilton. Keith Olbermann has been fired more times than a Civil War cannon.Wells Fargo opened a new banking firm Monday that serves people with fifty million dollars. Ask Argus anything you want to know or ask Argus his advice about comedy, writing, Hollywood, etc. I read about it in a Conde Nast tourism article, Two Reasons to Visit Seattle. They say that life imitates art but more often it imitates Gilligan's Island. Simone showed tremendous courage by stepping down from the very top because her mental state isn't quite right. The president sees an opening here. Argus was honored by Oklahoma Governor Brad Henry as the official comedian of the Oklahoma Centennial and appeared with the governor in the 2007 Tournament of Roses Parade. Argus Hamilton on the News: Medicare, Duck Dynasty & Much More! I remember a bartender shouted out, asking does anyone knows CPR so I yelled, I know ALL the letters of the alphabet! FEATURES. The cop asked me why I ran through a red light and I told him its 2023, I dont see color. [5] His specialty was to make funny comments on the news of the day. Its an outrageous seizure of private property. Tiger Woods played well over the weekend in the Los Angeles Open sponsored by Genesis, the parent company of Hyundai. We thank you. Argus Hamilton is the man Robin Williams once called "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom." The Silicon Valley Banks failure was blamed on the combination of higher interest rates and the banks woke business practices. He'd just steal the show. We represent our speakers equally, so our goal is to provide a keynote speaker that best fits YOU. I would like to join the exclusive Laugh Factory Members Club. Hamilton: Buzz Aldrin gets married at 93; honeymooning at Viagra Falls? Its always my richest crowd of the year. He has responded to accusations he gave unwanted hugs the same way he'd answer if accused of beheading a movie studio owner's horse. Hamilton: In those Super Bowl ads, its about what sells beer. Traveling From California Who is Argus Hamilton, and why is everybody quoting him? We are here to help! Oklahoma Speakers 2023. Argus performs at corporate, political and charity events around the country. (Unbelievable, but true.) Contact Argus@ArgusHamilton.com for more information. The Daily Mail says Google CEO Larry Page is on a private island in the Fijis until the virus ends. Hes a loyal Democrat. They jam up traffic, add to restaurant waiting time and clog up golf courses. You can add location information to your Tweets, such as your city or precise location, from the web and via third-party applications. AAE Named to Inc. Best Workplaces in 2022. It was reported Tuesday that Las Vegas hotels on the Strip were having a real cannabis problem. Now Biden wants to issue his own trading card, but he's terrified they'll put his career stats on the back of the card. Argus Hamilton Comments on the News: Miley Cyrus and Much More! Are you singing the seasonal allergies blues? The next day he got a nice card from Nancy Pelosi urging him to stay positive. Everyone agrees he needs at least three more concussions to be as funny as Terry Bradshaw. Argus Hamilton performs at corporate, political and charity events around the country. Political Column syndicated in 180 newspapers across the US daily Official Comedian of the Oklahoma Centennial Fee Range $7,500 - $10,000 Traveling From Oklahoma and California Meet Argus Hamilton, the funniest topical comedian in America, the man Robin Williams once called "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom." So far, Im blessed to be having a good year financially. Theyd better give it to us. Academy Awards producers are reported worried the ceremony will draw low ratings due to stars using the stage as a political platform in the past. Argus Hamilton Comments on the News: From A-Rod to Carlos Danger, Argus Hamilton Comments on the News: The Royal Baby & Much More. The official Facebook page of comedian, talk show host, and writer Argus Hamilton. When all the guys my age were back in high school, we fantasized about having sex with Raquel Welch. Out of these cookies, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are as essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. Meet Argus Hamilton, the funniest topical comedian in America, the man Robin Williams once called "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom." Porn Hub offered to help the White House fix the ObamaCare website Tuesday. Democratic Congresswoman Rosa DeLauro called for gender equity in car safety testing Friday in House hearings. A proud graduate of the University of Oklahoma and now based in Los Angeles, Argus brings an unusual perspective to the news from Washington and around the country. Hamilton: Still counting Super Bowl points in Arizona. Argus James Hamilton III is the son, grandson and great-grandson of Methodist ministers in the South. Argus Hamilton on the News: Elton John, Mayor Rob Ford, the NSA & more! Hollywood legendary movie star Raquel Welch died after a short illness in L.A. Wednesday at age eighty-two. In their new ad campaign, Carnival promises to treat you like Read more, In the news, Cyprus agreed to seize ten percent of the money in high-level Cyprus bank accounts to avoid bankruptcy. To back President Obamas gun control measures Read more, The news, as one twisted mind sees it In the news, McDonalds announced a huge increase in sales in November after its first-ever drop in October. Argus Hamilton's daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. Argus Hamilton's daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. All rights reserved. Meet the funniest topical comedian in America, the man Robin Williams once called "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom." A proud graduate of the University of Oklahoma and now based in Los Angeles, Argus brings an unusual perspective to the news from Washington and around the country. It was a challenge for the legendary golfer. Elton John dared the Russian government to cancel his upcoming concert in Moscow Tuesday, saying he will speak Read more, Porn Hub, Obamacare and much more! Oklahoma humorist Argus Hamilton will headline the four-day event, which also will include national and regional comedians and a special musical guest. Reproduction and distribution of content, with or without modification, without written permission of Laugh Factory Inc., is prohibited. Hamilton: What happened to presidential quality control? Argus Hamilton's daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. Im an English Monarchist and a Southern secessionist, Argus says. The St. Louis Post Dispatch said Anheuser-Busch executives met with beer distributors to assure them all marketing from now on will be vetted from the top. In college I dedicated my life to causing as much trouble as he did. Tweet with a location. Supermarket News reports shortages of tinned fish, and lettuce, dwindling beef supplies, and even a champagne shortage, along with the egg shortage causing poultry products to skyrocket. By continuing to browse, you consent to our use of cookies. Celebrations; Food; Parenting; Health; . Les municipalits ont tenu profiter d'un moment de rpit dans la crise sanitaire pour clbrer la fte Nationale. "Let's see Rush Limbaugh get to the right of that." All American Entertainment Named to Inc. Best Workplaces in 2022. Copyright Notice: This website is protected by U.S. and International copyright laws. Editorials Letters Columns Rants & Raves. Read more, Miley Cyrus, George Clooney, Obamacare and much more Miley Cyrus and her boyfriend Liam Hemsworth reportedly broke up Monday due to her raunchy MTV Awards performance. Hes also gotten the boot from MSNBC, KCBS, Fox Sports, NBC Football Night in America and ESPN. Argus' daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, including the Humor Times, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. Columns; Contests; Lifestyles. The food went rancid Read more, The news according to Argus! Billboard quoted Cardi B denouncing the soaring price of groceries in Los Angeles supermarkets Tuesday, prompting economists to say her quote shows inflation is beginning to hit the rich. Best prices and best deals for cars in Provence-Alpes-Cte d'Azur. The Walt Disney Company released the trailer for the upcoming action adventure Peter Pan and Wendy based on J.M. Comedian and columnist Argus Hamilton's daily monologue of jokes on news events, politics, sports and celebrities. Argus James Hamilton III is the son, grandson and great-grandson of Methodist ministers in the South. The same day, Chinas navy sent three warships into Taiwanese territorial waters. Prince William and Kate left her parents home Friday, sparking frenzy that the royal birth was Read more. Electing a guy with Donald Trump's personality as the president is like marrying a nymphomaniac. You also get exclusive voting rights to determine what stories should be covered and what kind of content you would like to see. I finally heard on the news why were having an egg shortage. Fox replies, hold my beer! The Canadian Snowbird Association reported that the state of Arizona gets a million Canadian visitors every year during the winter. "Let's see Rush Limbaugh get to the right of that.". But opting out of some of these cookies may have an effect on your browsing experience. U.S. numbers will start declining as our numbers lag a week behind England's. Argus Hamilton Comments on the News: Twinkies, Royal Babies & More, Argus Hamilton Comments on the News: Paula Deen & Much More. Classic photo of Argus performing on The Tonight Show. Hamilton: Murdochs much-younger fiance calls off wedding; he must have passed physical, Hamilton: Male crash dummies are too proud to ask for directions. Argus Hamilton is the man Robin Williams once called "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom." Argus' daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, including the Humor Times, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. magazine and by radio personalities including Paul Harvey. SPORTS. sustaining monthly donation. By Argus Hamilton. President Biden was a big hit in Ireland Wednesday. Help us keep the lights on with a small (or large!) We just dont Read more, Carnival reimbursed the U.S. for rescuing two liners stranded at sea with overflowing sewage early this year. Argus Hamilton is the man Robin Williams once called "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom." Argus Hamilton on the News: Porn Hub Offers to Help Fix Obamacare Site. Review and Buy used cars online at OOYYO. All Rights Reserved. If you dont think that painkillers make you goofy and funny, how do you explain Jerry Lewiss career?President Obamas campaign ads linked Mitt Romney to Big Oil on Monday after the president attacked oil profits. Back in 1999 Bill Clinton paid Paula Jones $850,000 to shut up and go away and in 2016 Donald Trump paid Stormy Daniels $130,000 Donald Trumps grand jury recessed a second straight day Thursday as the case against him for his hush money payment to a porn star seemed to falter. By supporting creators you love on Patreon, you're becoming an active participant in their creative process. Argus Hamilton's daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. In the news, Bill Maher was sued for joking that Donald Trump is the spawn of his mother having sex with an orangutan. And Sunday marks the Protestant Holiest of Holies, the final round of the Masters at Augusta National. Tom Brady was reported by Radar Online Tuesday to have decided to spend the next year before he becomes an NFL sportscaster performing stand-up comedy. Its a full-service bank. Argus Hamilton on the News: iPad Air & much more! Contents of this site are Copyright 2023 Prescott Newspapers, Inc. and Western News&Info, Inc. All rights reserved. Who We Are is a highly acclaimed weekday digest of news analysis, policy and opinion written from the heartland as opposed to the MSM's ubiquitous Beltway echo chambers for grassroots leaders nationwide. Search for real estate and find the latest listings of Cagnes-sur-Mer Property for sale. Hamilton: State of Union is strong; at least when it comes to eggs. Oklahoma Speakers is a speakers bureau that specializes in helping meeting planners, corporations, and associations locate, select, and confirm the best speakers, entertainers and other talent for their events and meetings. We'll never post to Facebook without your permission We will access Facebook to get and use your email address, He is regularly quoted by daily newspapers including The San Francisco Chronicle and the Los Angeles Times, by weekly business papers including the Orange County Business Journal, by Time magazine and by radio personalities including Paul Harvey. Argus Hamilton performs at corporate, political and charity events around the country. Argus James Hamilton III is the son, grandson and great-grandson of Methodist ministers in the South. Get access to a bi-monthly live Q&A with Argus (and sometimes a special guest!). Argus Hamilton on the News: Medicare, Duck Dynasty & Much More! People magazine just named her least Likely Ever to Become President. Friday, April 23, 2010 Argus Hamilton's column for 4-23-10 Hamilton: With all the potato chip flavors, who needs other foods. Government workers will have to stop not working. "Let's see Rush Limbaugh get to the right of that.". He is regularly quoted by daily newspapers including, , by weekly business papers including the. President Biden gleefully mocked Donald Trump Friday for issuing a limited set of trading cards as NFT for $99 on the crypto market. Here's part four of our annual look at the Year in Jokes. Argus Hamilton is the man Robin Williams once called "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom." Argus' daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, including the Humor Times, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. Get access to a fantastic community of comedy fans! Watch Argus tell all of the stories from the early days at The Store to today and everything in between. Britain reports the Delta variant's toll on Britons was much milder than expected as infection rates fell for the seventh day in a row. By Argus Hamilton, January 18, 2014 Missouris State Fair banned a rodeo clown for life who wore a Barack Obama mask while a bull Read more, A-Rod: Trying to enhance his chances of playing again The FDA discovered e-coli in ground beef that is distributed nationwide but it wont hurt the restaurant business. The Centers for Disease Control reported a massive outbreak of bird flu in the United States has left 47 million chickens dead or dying, resulting in shortages. | Terms of Service | Privacy Policy, Tucson in process of returning land to Tohono O'odham Nation, Deadly heat waves threaten older people as summer nears, 20 California condors in Arizona, Utah died from avian flu, Shooting at carnival Saturday night being investigated by Prescott Police, Photos: Prescott welcomes Whiskey Off-Road 2023, PUSD Governing Board to discuss science curriculum at May 2 meeting, Lawmakers wrestle with bill that keeps minors from porn, Blasting at Hwy. Argus Hamilton Comments on the News: Rodeo Clowns & Much More! The UN News reported Tuesday that plastic pollution in the world's oceans is expected to double by 2030. The owners of the medals have notified the police. Take every bad habit you have, then multiply it by ten thousand, and youll realize that five years is a pretty good run.California storms churned waves that clobbered the World Yacht Races Monday. Donald Trump faces possible indictment in New York today for a hush money payment to the porn star. Read more, In the news, Bill Clinton hosts the annual Bob Hope Desert Classic in Palm Springs all week. Tiger Woods is favored to win the Masters for the first. Help us keep the lights on with a small (or large!) The January 6 Committee issued a criminal referral on Trump, citing a 14th Amendment article written in 1866 to keep Confederate officers from re-entering politics after the war. Hamilton: Did Madonna get stung by a bee? Silicon Valley Bank was shut down by federal regulators Fridays after depositors pulled $42 billion dollars out of the bank in one day. Hamilton: Latest object shot out of sky shaped like Corvette? Travel and Leisure forecast that 47% of Americans will travel this month for winter vacations and for Christmas and holiday celebrations with family. [1] [6] Biography It spooked even Big Bank customers like me. You will receive 5 new columns each week and 2 columns from the archives. "I'm an English Monarchist and a Southern secessionist," Argus jokes. Shes going by the book. The inventor of the Stairmaster died at 54, the inventor of gymnastics died at 57 and the inventor of opium died at the age of 116, during an earthquake. Senior Living reports retirement communities in Palm Springs now offer Baby Boomers enclosed gated neighborhoods with golf courses, pools, tennis courts, clubhouses with billiard rooms, gyms and card rooms. So far Read more, Apple introduces the new iPad Air, demonstrates it on the ObamaCare website Apple introduced a new iPad and called it the iPad Air Tuesday. Do the Bidens ever take one day off? "Let's see Rush Limbaugh get to the right of that." The court ruled that its discriminatory to make only the white and Asian high school students do their homework.Apple was reported Monday to be using college interns who work for free in Apples Chinese assembly factories. JamesEdition can help you find the home that match all the preferences for your dream home. Argus Hamilton's daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. It costs $6 million for a 30-second commercial. Reaction was bad. You just select one of the six lines on the table. This year Bill Murray was in Florida telling cameras here we are at Tom Bradys retirement again. Argus was honored by Oklahoma Governor Brad Henry as the official comedian of the Oklahoma Centennial and appeared with the governor in the 2007 Tournament of Roses Parade. Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. That explains everything. They just added family and relationship counseling because the minute the bank opened its doors, the lobby was filled with beautiful groupies.The Daily Caller quoted a book Monday saying Rick Perry was on painkillers during the GOP debates to relieve lower back pain. Las Vegas hotels were reported Tuesday setting up legal consumption lounges for pot smokers to keep them out of the casinos and off the streets. Madonna blamed ageism and sexism President Biden will deliver his State of the Union tonight before a joint session of the House and Senate gathered in the House Chamber in the U.S. Capitol. Copyright 1979 - 2022. The Comedy Store is sending me down to San Diego on New Years Eve to perform at the Comedy Store La Jolla on its 45th anniversary. A proud graduate of the University of Oklahoma and now based in Los Angeles, Argus brings an unusual perspective to the news from Washington and around the country. Argus Hamilton's daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations. Who is Argus Hamilton, and why is everybody quoting him? Call us to speak with a booking agent to discuss your event or specific speaker request. When he's in Los Angeles, he can be seen working out the latest material nightly at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. Fox News cited an intelligence report Thursday saying UFO sightings have surged in the past two years in the U.S. CNN, NBC and ABC reported there were 400 sightings of UFOs in the U.S. last week. A proud graduate of the University of Oklahoma and now based in Los Angeles, Argus brings an unusual perspective to the news from Washington and around the country. Argus is regularly quoted by daily newspapers including The San Francisco Chronicle and the Los Angeles Times, by weekly business papers including the Orange County Business Journal, by Time magazine and by radio personalities including Paul Harvey. Just two more payments and those dozen eggs are mine. Lets see Rush Limbaugh get to the right of that.. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. Then they took off and soared to $22,000 per card. In a nod to Holy Week, MSNBC crucifies Trump every morning and every afternoon Fox News raises him from the dead. Argus' daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, including the Humor Times, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. All American Speakers Bureau is a full-service talent booking agency providing information on booking Argus Hamilton for speaking engagements, personal appearances and corporate events. Bookmark the page and share it! Naturally Disney changed everything to make it acceptable to todays woke culture. Contact an All American Speakers Bureau booking agent for more information on Argus Hamilton speaking fees, availability, speech topics and cost to hire for your next live or virtual event. Argus Hamilton Comments on the News: Umbrella-gate & More! Jay is now watched more closely than a Pennsylvania groundhog when walks onstage. Submit your best content, jokes, photos, or videos to become an exclusive Laugh Factory member and have your content shared on our website. In Los Angeles Read more, Paula Deen & the N-word and much more Paula Deen said she uses the N-word when joking and suggested that black waiters dress like slaves. Hamilton-Just two more payments and those dozen eggs are all mine, Hamilton: Cant find financing for an egg salad sandwich, Hamilton: UFOs dropped off classified docs in a Delaware garage, Hamilton- All China needs is the Colonels secret recipe. . Barneys Beanery owner Lauren Taines offered me a dinner for being the last bar I drank at before getting sober Nov. 3, 1986. Scientists say its far from over and prepare for new variants. They said it shows that in the past World Cups it was the gays who caused all the trouble. Related Tags: Information on keynote speaking engagements, personal appearances, corporate entertainment and appearance fees for Argus Hamilton, an inspirational motivational speaker. When home in Los Angeles, he can be seen live onstage at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. Hollywood should stick to doing what it does best, cocaine and each other. Some of them wanted to exclude massage parlors, dog tracks and porn shops but didnt have the votes. All rights reserved. Barries classic 1904 English stage hit. When home in Los Angeles, he can be seen live onstage at The Comedy Store in . Welcome to part five of our annual look at the Year in Jokes. Hamilton: Argus responsible for pandemic; he didnt send email to 10 people, Hamilton: Southwest flight is booked for Jan. 5th or 6th or 7th, Hamilton: Even the signs are private in La Jolla, Hamilton: Harry and Meghan insist in millionth interview they just want privacy, Hamilton: The Fourth Wiseman brought a fruitcake. The Read more, In the news, Carnival Cruise liner Triumph had a fire in the engine room off Mexico that knocked out all electricity on the ship. Commentary. However the bar is set pretty high for Brady. Forbes magazine published an article called Ten Reasons to Drink During the Holidays, citing the sociable nature of office parties and family reunions. One boat capsized and steering mountings were knocked loose.Its times like this when Mitt Romneys yacht elevator in La Jolla suggests hed be a wise steward of the U.S. economy.Current TV fired Keith Olbermann as host of the cable networks evening news show Friday. By allowing ads to appear on this site, you support the local businesses who, in turn, support great journalism. Comedy Store legend Argus Hamilton jokes about the news of the day and chats with comedians and other entertainers from the basement of the World Famous Come. Olympic gymnast Simone Biles sat in the stands and cheered her team to victory in Japan this past week. This Christmas, Kanye West will be going from house to house to make your drunk uncle seem OK. As we share our homes with relatives and loved ones, we are reminded of that first Christmas scene. Fox News 92-year-old CEO Rupert Murdoch ordered Tucker Carlson fired, causing Fox stock to crash $980 million in value Monday, three days after he paid Dominion $787 million to settle a libel lawsuit. Please Note: All American Speakers Bureau is a full-service talent booking agency providing information on booking Argus Hamilton for speaking engagements, personal appearances and corporate events.

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